My personal goal is to have skin like cowhide

cowhideThis didn’t just happen.

I’ve been writing and submitting…and been rejected for years. So when Walnut Springs Press emailed me in October wanting to know if I still had that manuscript I submitted a year and a half ago and could they publish it, I sat and stared at my computer for ten minutes without blinking. Rick thought I got a hold of some bad Diet Pepsi.

I started writing in earnest while working on an MA in English. I was super-de-duper bored of writing academic papers and needed an outlet. At the same time, my daughter Sarah and her friend Shandi were dragging all kinds of LDS young adult romances through the house. Occasionally I would pick one up, read a few chapters and, appalled, think “I can write better than this.” This was pre-submission-rejection-prideful-Amy. So I took Sarah and Shandi’s challenge and began writing my own story.

And it was hard, really hard; harder than anything I’d done academically. I worked on it for a few years, in the cracks of my days, while I finished my graduate work and took care of my family. I gained a deep respect for writers and what they do, and the time it takes to do it. I hired a contract editor – because we don’t catch our own mistakes, no matter how good we are – a darling girl who I love with all my heart. She taught me and I listened and we worked together to improve the story. I began submitting and was promptly rejected…and would re-write and submit again…and was promptly rejected…and would re-write and submit again, you get the picture. I could wallpaper my family room with all my rejection letters.

It hurt.

I thought I had gained some “thick skin” in graduate school…I was wrong, like I was wrong about a lot of things. My personal goal is to have skin like cowhide.

I know what you’re thinking, “why put yourself through that and who in their right mind wants skin like cowhide?!” I do it – and want the skin – because of what happens to each of us when we read a good story: we feel a little less alone and understand ourselves a little more. I want to write a story that does that, no matter how hard it is.
So I’ll keep working on my writing and my goal of cowhide-like skin and hope both keep improving.